from a gTalk conversation with theodore - the topic arose after talking about how excited [note: sarcasm] i am that my mom will probably start trying to set me up with 'nice taiwanese boys' once i move home. it's a sort of glimpse into my neurotic psyche.
me: i realize that anyone i really love, i think they deserve better than me.
me: so maybe i should just marry someone i don't love and it'll actually work out.
theodore: no, you deserve to be happy.
me: that's sweet of you to say, but you know i don't believe that.
theodore: i think you do, but you don't want to.
me: well, that's stupid.
theodore: you are afraid of true happiness.
theodore: because you never have had it.
me: maybe i don't believe i deserve it because i've never had it.
theodore: maybe, but i think you have had glimpes of it. and it scares you.
who knows.. maybe he's right. i never though of myself as being afraid of it before, just undeserving, but i guess it's a possibility. maybe i'll just become celibate (yea, right). and adopt babies from third world countries. hmm..
1 comment:
I concur - maybe Theodore is right
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